Tuesday, November 11, 2008

narrowing the options.

well i'm almost done with my 2 weeks. i have very little to actually do seeing as people stopped giving me new assignments (obviously) and i have started passing off all my regular work to other people. so here i am, at my desk pretending to look busy because i feel weird about not working, but not really having much of anything to do. so i spend my time researching possible plans for the future, researching my dream trip to europe, and generally doing not much of anything. it's all kind of silly really.

speaking of plans for the future, a new option has emerged... fresno.

fresno??? as in the same fresno my parents so eagerly moved out of when they were my age?

yes, that fresno.

you see i have a LOT of family in the fresno area. and some wonderful cousins. one of whom would like me to come live with her, which would take care of my lack of a living situation. fresno would also put me closer to brian, mary, and camden; which would be so great. there would be a lot of details to work out such as the main one, a job. but i have a few ideas and my family has a few ideas, so who knows. it definitely could happen.

no matter where i end up it is basically going to be a starting over for me. new home. new job. new church. new friends. even if i go to LA i'm basically going to be starting fresh. i'm really open to anything at this point.

these are the main things i'm looking for:
-a comfortable, afforadble living situation
-a job that will pay the bills as well as not make me miserable
-family nearby

as of right now, the fresno option has 2 out of 3.
LA has 1 out of 3.
and Europe has 0 out of 3.

i wish i could see the future! i can't wait to see what happens!

Monday, November 3, 2008

life is a process.

well, today is the beginning of a change for me. i'll start with some background.

i never intended to move to arizona, however a good job opportunity kind of fell into my lap, and so being the spontaneous person i am, i jumped in. so for the last 5or 6 months I have been working at that job. from the start i could tell it wasn't a fit for me, however i was learning a lot and determined to stick it out as long as i could.

since then things have been hard for me. between spending most of my awake hours at a job i am unhappy at, having very few friends in this state who are not married, trying to adjust to post college life, some unexpected relationship drama, and feeling a general lack of independence due to living with my parents; things have definitely been tough.

this last month i reached a place where i realized i just wasn't very happy, and it was getting worse not better. and i am a firm believer that if you are unhappy, it is your responsibility to fix it, not just sit there doing the "woah is me" dance. so that's what i'm doing.

today i gave two weeks notice, making the 14th my last day of work. i have no set plans after that except a long overdue vacation to go see my nephew, then thanaksgiving with the fam. december will largely be my "operation figure out my life" month. and hopefully january will be the beginning of a new chapter.

the options right now are pretty endless. i am 95% confident i will be moving out of Phoenix. beyond that, these are some things i'm considering.

-move back to LA
-go work abroad for a while
-do a ywam dts
-go back to school somewhere
-become a flight attendant
-become a homeless person (just kidding)

but seriously, there are a lot of big decisions i am going to need to be making in the coming months. i would be grateful to any of you who would be willing to pray for me during this time.

you can specifically pray for:
-that God would clearly reveal the direction He would like me to go in.
-wisdom and discernment for myself to hear God when He tells me, and obey.
-more faith. i can always use more faith. (i'm a worrier)
-that some "in the meantime" money opportunities would present themselves so I can at least be bringing some income in.
-my insurance/cobra would all work out so i can continue all the different doctors/meds/etc that are a part of my life right now.

thanks everyone. love you!